Everyone wants love in their life. It is elusive to so many who are on the “dating scene” or who have gone through many relationships, investing so much and not having the results they ultimately wanted.
Is love just not meant for you? Do you have to accept that you are unlucky in love?
The answer to both questions is of course is no – there is no such thing as “not meant” or being “unlucky” in life or in love.
Then – what will it take?
It will take some honesty, persistence and action, like any other goal you would like to accomplish. Great relationships don’t just work – they are work. Just like your career, your kids or any endeavour you care about doing well, attracting a loving relationship will take honesty, persistence and action.
But if you are willing to open up and be true to yourself, some of the tips below may just lead you to the relationship you’ve dreamed of.
Is a loving relationship worth it? Are you ready?
If your answer is yes, keep reading…
Believe you are deserving
Our beliefs and thoughts define our world and that includes our relationships. Take the time to examine your beliefs about finding love. Are these beliefs true? Are they beneficial? Are they even your own? Our past experiences and even past lives, can define our beliefs. Be conscious of all the negative things you are telling yourself and tell yourself instead that you are deserving of all good.
Forgive yourself for past failures
Forgiveness is another way of letting go of what doesn’t benefit us. Think of the times when you needed to forgive yourself or others in the context of a relationship and do so. Say you forgive them out loud and release it to the Universe or your higher power until it begins to feel true.
Visualize your ideal relationship
Everyone’s idea of the ideal relationship is different. Be totally honest with yourself and write down what your ideal relationship is. Give some thought to it. Do you want marriage? Children? Companionship only? Writing it down crystallizes it and if you forget, you can always read what you wrote to keep you on track.
Visualize your ideal partner
The same thing goes for defining what your ideal partner is like. What are their traits? What are their values? Interests? Likes/dislikes? Outlook on life? How do they treat you? These questions will help you hone in on your own wants and needs. Knowing yourself better is always attractive too. Again, write it all down somewhere in list form to keep you on track.
Compromise on some of the “little things”, not big things
Once you’ve written down what you want most in a relationship and in a partner, it’s time to figure out what on your lists are must haves versus nice to haves. Perhaps you wrote that your ideal partner is 5’10” a size 4 with blonde hair and blue eyes. Well, could you compromise on that just a little? It’s up to you of course. Only you can determine what’s a big thing and what’s a little thing to you. The important thing is you do a heart to heart with yourself on what you truly want to bring into your life.
Once you find your true ideal and be flexible on the little things, I would advise that you don’t settle for anything less. By not compromising on what is truly most important to you, you are preventing disappointment later on.
Trust your intuition
Everyone has intuition. It’s that unexplained feeling you get that can’t be based on anything rational. If you aren’t used to using intuition, there are ways to cultivate it. Using intuition to attract a loving relationship is probably the best bit of advice on this list. It involves listening carefully, being honest with oneself once again and being in touch with your higher self. There is a part of us that knows better than we do – listen to it.
Trust your higher power
Don’t be afraid to ask in earnest for help from your higher power or your guides / angels and know that the universe will support you. Come from a true honest place about your desires and the universe will guide you – be ready to receive and utilize any guidance that you receive.
Love and nurture yourself
Dating can mean disappointments. Make sure to take care of yourself – spend time with friends and family, meditate, do yoga, learn something new, pamper yourself, be kind to yourself and get to know yourself. Look at it as a special time you have to spend with you before you have a partner and have someone else than to worry about! Enjoy life for what it is today.
Be willing to move on
I know we are dealing with hearts but it’s ok to put yourself first. If everything is telling you that someone is not the person of your dreams, be willing to set them free. Remember, you are deserving, you know what you want and you aren’t into settling. Keep a high but realistic standard, check what you wrote in steps 3 and 4 and know when it’s time to move on.
Be open to new experiences
This is the action part – now you have to get out there because you won’t meet anyone if you don’t! You will need to be brave but remember to have fun too. A positive, open, fun attitude will get you quite far in finding a loving relationship. Try joining a group, taking classes or sign up for internet dating. Once you open to new experiences and joy – you are increasing your chances of attracting the relationship of your dreams.